What is Human Trafficking?

A Growing Heart and a Cry for the Unshackling

It wasn’t until I was leaving the airport, that all of the emotion of my time here hit me.  As the Thai security officer asked security questions about my bag with his thick accent, I held back tears, the overflow of my heart swelling with joy and gratitude to the man who stood in front of me. I’m grateful to have caught a glimmer of this man’s language, his culture, his people, and his nation. My heart was widened this day for Thailand, and for Asia. Space was made to hold these people, their cultures, and their countries within this little heart of mine.

Asia had been an area and a people unknown to me. Though I could appreciate the presence of my friends and of these cultures, I now have a little deeper and more heartfelt connection to them and to the countries they call home.  I’d never really desired to go to Asia. I had nothing against it- I’d just never had a super huge draw. Not like the way that my heart beats for Africa .  I didn’t think that my heart was capable of holding another continent,  or another nation so dearly. But my heart… it grew.  My quick response to people asking how Thailand went, “my heart grew three sizes” I’ve never truly been a Grinch, but the expansion of what my heart is now holding makes it seem to be so.

I find that each country I visit unlocks another piece of my heart, expanding its ability to see, feel, and love. With every person I encounter, a unique story leafed open before my very eyes- it’s a true honor to encounter such beauty, and such freedom within the glimpse of life exchanged in these moments.

There were justice issues that I couldn’t let my heart enter into because I thought it to be too much, the task too great to make any sort of impact.  More and more I’m learning that the smallest things can make the greatest of impacts. And if I can show up with the small piece that I have, then God can step in and take it to a whole other level.

My heart broke for the city of Pattaya. It’s people so beautiful, so kind, with such warm hearts to welcome new comers. And when I surveyed these newcomers, the tourists I couldn’t say the same. I felt the depth of greed that we greeted this nation with.  There was this drive present to take as much as possible for as little as possible. There is such a deep undervaluing of the true beauty of peoples hearts, of their stories, and what they have to offer.

I saw a glimpse of the ensnarement that this greed has fueled. Men and women trapped in professions that they view as their only option- as their view of what they have to offer the world can be purchased.  My heart broke for this city and for her people. People who don’t know that their beauty can be appreciated without being taken advantage of, and that their beauty expands beyond what is taken.  And my heart just screams knowing that so many don’t know that they are worth SO MUCH MORE.

I had the opportunity to take an elephant ride, but turned it down as what I’d seen made my heart just as sick.  When I think of elephants I can see them in the jungle, or roaming plains strong, and tall, and free-  freely drinking at the water’s edge.  This image was quite the opposite of what I’d encountered as drivers prodded their animals with a sharp stick, their skin so dry it was raw, and the breaks they were given to drink not lasting more than a few minutes for the countless laps around the pen to entertain the flood of tourists looking for a good time.

And I couldn’t help but draw the lines of similarity of the attitude that was keeping these magnificent creatures in chains and what was keeping so many of this country’s people in bondage within the sex-trade.  In light of some of the conversations I’d had with men looking for said, “good time” I couldn’t help but ask, what kind of life is being offered?  Sure, maybe food and water are being provided,  their family’s debts are being paid- yet they are shackled to the demands of others. The weathered skin depicting the weathered un-watered hearts. It may be a means- but there HAS to be more than this.

While there I heard this phrase on the lips of men, “What happens in Thailand, stays in Thailand”. I want to speak out against this adage, as yes, maybe something is staying- such as perpetuated abuse and exploitation, the degradation of people’s hearts. What happens in Thailand doesn’t just stay, these men too are taking back with them what they have stolen and having dropped their identity as protectors are returning as abusers. Come on, guys, wake up. What happens in a place has deeper ramifications that we could ever comprehend. Let’s stop greedily taking what is not ours to take. Let’s instead turn to these places to give. Give people your time, and of what you have to offer. People aren’t objects to be sold, let’s stop treating them as such. Let’s re-appreciate their value, by honoring people and the fullness of life that they hold.

Just a few of the turnings of my heart after my quick 2 days in Thailand, but I can see it as the kindling of so much more.

 


I am by no means an expert or even comprehend the inner working of this system. I just see this injustice and refuse to remain silent about it.

I posted a video on What Human Trafficking is that Exodus Cry put out, and these are a few organizations I have deep respect for in their fight against this injustice:


Exodus Cry

Not Abandoned

Tamar Center

International Justice Mission

and then a little bit closer to home (because this is happening here):

Breaking Free

Pan-handled Pondering

Tonight we had a lovely women's night with ladies from my church- a place of new beginnings. I am excited for all that will be birthed out of this new place of connecting and reconnecting. I haven't been a part of a church for a while as the most recent community I had been a part of ended up being a very painful experience to all involved. To new beginnings!

The theme of our night centered around an act of service to the communities in which we each live. Everyone brought something: deodorants, toothbrushes, granola bars, waters, socks, scarves, underwear, etc. And we packed little care packages to share with the people we encounter in need on the street. This was a super fun activity and terrific way to connect with one another and provide avenues to connect in our respective communities where we live or work or study.

Some of the conversations surrounding the night I found fascinating. It opened my eyes to the cultures in whose midst I stood. Not bad. Just different. And always good. I heard twangs of apprehension and stretching into a new arena for some. From others I heard of the years or traditions families have made around serving the least of these. In whatever arena I find myself, I always feel bicultural- like I live in the realm of the both/ and.

Both of my parents work in some ways directly or indirectly with those in the system or off grid. Single teen moms on welfare to the train hopping travelers. Through them I've had an indirect access to the other worlds surrounding us.  Though I don't know the depths of the struggle of true homelessness (I've had very limited couch hoping experiences during in between seasons with foreseeable reprieve)  some people very dear to me have experienced the depths of the struggle encountered in homelessness. Through my parents, I've had more prominent connections with some people, and almost regard each other as long lost friends when we each inquire about one another through one of my parents.  Others have been very formative in my thinking (and style!) even in such a brief encounters as giving someone a ride who got separated from their traveling crew. And. At the same time, as my parents are more aware of the interworkings of these cultures- I've been kept at a safe distance. Sheltered. Yet Not. Sheltered enough to be safe, yet not sheltered enough to be kept away from these worlds. Instead I've been given the opportunity and freedom to embrace and build friendships. A sort of urban biculturalism.

So that's the set up. And here are the thoughts...

When encountering pan-handlers a common phrase I hear (and one that has been the guiding of my own actions in some situations) is, "I don't give money, because I don't know what they're going to spend it on..." Totally valid. We invest our money where we want to see something in return. We desire for there to be a fruitful return, whether to us or to the person we give to. But this draws out a bunch of questions for me...
Okay so if that's our stance then, the products we buy, the companies we are supporting- are we too taking into account where they spend their money whether to line the pockets of the CEOs to spend simply on more expensive booze or vices? Are we gaging whether where we buy our clothes or foods to ensure there is a benefit to all to give back to it's people who've developed, manufactured, produced, and advertised their product. Or do we look at where we are spending our money? On necessity? On pleasure? On self medication? On other investments that bring forth life?
It may not be the typical 9-5 but can we regarded pan-handlers as business men. Working shifts to earn their living to cover their necessities, pleasures, self-medications, and investments. I guess the point to my questions. Whether on the street corner or in the skyscraper aren't we all the same? And if we are concerned with peoples vices, are we offering another way? Are we willing to step into the unknown depths of peoples souls and partnering with them in it. Expectancy of hope and healing and new life.
And the withholding of our money is this a posture of our hearts? Withholding the offering of ourselves in our time? Maybe it's not. I know there is a practicality to budgeting what and where and how we give in order to be good stewards of what we are entrusted with whether it be time or finances.
A face comes to mind. She asked me for money, I asked her what for? A beer, she bluntly responded. I ended up walking into the local convenience store and getting her favorite. I want to say that as we sat on the curb a remarkable life changing experience happened. Maybe it did, and maybe it didn't. I don't know. I don't know the effects that this singular moment held. I know that we continued to waive in the crossing of our paths.
But then what if I give someone the money they need to OD?
It's a risk.
But I can't help but always think of the potential for good that each heart holds. And as I give, I trust the motive of my heart, and the bigness of God to shape and move and mold both where my hand is set out to give, and the hearts of those that receive.

A song by Jenny and Tyler comes to mind as I write:

I am who I am because of who my Grandma is.

I am who I am because of who my grandma is.

I say “is” because she lived her life in such a way that she is still alive today. Not only in memories and attributes she deposited in each of us, but also before the throne of her father. Now fully alive, even more alive than she ever was here.

If there is anything that anyone could ever express about Grandma Pat, it’s of her love. The love that she tangibly expresses daily is one that reflects the heart of God. She was at EVERY major event in my life. Selflessly, in every way imaginable it flows from her.  Her joy-filled smile to express her excitement to see you, sharing who she is with anyone and everyone she meets. She doesn’t just hold love in her heart, but expresses it to make a lasting impact on the world.

My Grandma is a LOVER.

One thing that blesses my heart is that she is always giving.  She would save up her change and give me a bag full to give to missionaries in Africa. It would only be a few dollars worth, but she gives what she has. She made up a shoebox each year to send Christmas gifts to those who have so little. Whenever I traveled out of the country for missions she gave $5 each month to support what Jesus and I were up to. She is always quick to pull out orange Tic Tacs or some goody to fill your sweet tooth. 

My Grandma is a GIVER.

            A good word is never to far from my grandma’s lips. She is quick to point out a job well done. A card sent out for every occasion signed with Love ‘N Prayers from Grandma Pat.

My Grandma is an ENCOURAGER.

            Once we pulled out every stuffed animal in the yard, made snacks, crowns out of little white flowers to celebrate the marriage of our Teddy bears and threw them a huge wedding party.

            With every game a life lesson learned: lessons about how to enter in, of how to be prepared for any given situation. She knows how to value a child and validate them recognizing where they are at and investing and encouraging their play.

My Grandma is an ENGAGER and a TEACHER, PRESENT to every opportunity.

            When she’d stay with us, night after night would be filled with stories of the “Good Old Days” as I would call it. Sharing the details of life’s ups and downs many of her kids and their lives and maybe a handful of others here. At bed time, Gabby and I would beg for one more Good Old Day Story.

My Grandma is a STORYTELLER.

            My grandma is not afraid to take risks, break through social norms to love, protect, care for and be with kids or grandkids. Her travels are many from the picnics in the park, to venturing around the country, and even to Costa Rica. Nothing can hold her back with boldness and extreme vigor she goes forward.

My grandma is an ADVENTUROUS PIONEER

            She would punch holes in construction paper and have us weave yarn through the holes with a needle made of cardboard. She made every Halloween costume, p.j.s, shirts, pillos, scrunchies for birthdays and Christmas. She decorated her apartment with each season. We made SO many crafts: pencil holders, play dough, collages- I can’t even count the number of crafts we completed.

My Grandma is CREATIVE and CRAFTY.

            These are just a few of the many attributes my grandma shares and holds. Many, I’m sure, gained along the way. Swimming through many of life’s waters, both rough and smooth. No matter how turbulent the waters she swims through with such poise and grace. And even know, I can’t help but think she is swimming .

I want to invite you into something…

I’ve been thinking about heaven a lot in the last couple of weeks. So imagine with me a moment.

4 After this I looked, and behold, a door standing open in heaven! And the first voice which I had heard addressing me like [the calling of] a ^[a]war trumpet said, Come up here, and I will show you what must take place in the future.

² At once I came under the [Holy] Spirit’s power, and behold, a throne stood in heaven, with One seated on the throne!

³ And He Who sat there appeared like [the crystalline brightness of] jasper and [the fiery] sardius, and encircling the throne there was a halo that looked like [a rainbow of] emerald.

⁴ Twenty-four other thrones surrounded the throne, and seated on these thrones were twenty-four elders (^[b]the members of the heavenly Sanhedrin), arrayed in white clothing, with crowns of gold upon their heads.

⁵ Out from the throne came flashes of lightning and rumblings and peals of thunder, and in front of the throne seven blazing torches burned, which are the seven Spirits of God [^[c]the sevenfold Holy Spirit];

⁶ And in front of the throne there was also what looked like a transparent glassy sea, as if of crystal. And around the throne, in the center at each side of the throne, were four living creatures (beings) who were full of eyes in front and behind [with intelligence as to what is before and at the rear of them].

⁷ The first living creature (being) was like a lion, the second living creature like an ox, the third living creature had the face of a man, and the fourth living creature [was] like a flying eagle.

⁸ And the four living creatures, individually having six wings, were full of eyes all over and within [underneath their wings]; and day and night they never stop saying, Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty (Omnipotent), Who was and Who is and Who is to come.

⁹ And whenever the living creatures offer glory and honor and thanksgiving to Him Who sits on the throne, Who lives forever and ever (through the eternities of the eternities),

¹⁰ The twenty-four elders (^[d]the members of the heavenly Sanhedrin) fall prostrate before Him Who is sitting on the throne, and they worship Him Who lives forever and ever; and they throw down their crowns before the throne, crying out,

¹¹ Worthy are You, our Lord and God, to receive the glory and the honor and dominion, for You created all things; by Your will they were [brought into being] and were created.

            -Revelation 4:1-10 Amplified Version

Because of who Grandma Pat is, what draws me particularly lately is the sea of glass. Liquid like sea? Solid like glass? Is it both? Regardless I can totally picture grandma swimming around the throne praising the Lord with an aquatic dance.

            She lived her life responding to the invitation of her Father. She started that dance, that life here and paved the way for me, and many here to enter in and truly live life.

untittled: being in process

I love this beautiful journey of becoming, and simply being who we are. Right here right now.

There's beauty in simple honesty with one's self and with others-  it's sacred ground.

Because you couldn't be just anyone- you are uniquely you. Every state your heart has taken, every shape to fit the mold- it's all beautiful.

And when the molds are changing shape- it's beautiful.

And when every thing's undone-it's beautiful.

Every tear, every breath -it's beautiful.

Every glimpse of more, every hope filled giggle- it's all beauty in the making.

Beauty is here. Beauty is now.
Now, have we the boldness to notice? to truly see, to let be seen? To embrace one another in the midst of it all, the incomplete and the not yet?

We are beings of beauty, every breath of the way.

Faith in What?

What I believe, and how I believe is ever being transformed. Some recent stirrings of my heart, and some good conversations inspired this. This isn't concrete or set in stone. Like anything within my life and heart, I desire for this to be malleable.

I believe that God is love. He - (I don't think that God is limited to one gender, I think that since we are created in His image both male and female the coming together of man and woman greater exemplifies the character of God-but I use the pronoun He, because it's just easier)- He is so much more- but ultimately love. I don't think that He's far off, rather SO near- tangibly expressing that love in both the extravagant and the most minute of details. Always communicating and if we are just willing to notice we'd be able to enter into some pretty awesome conversations. I believe that He has SO much for us. He has so much to give, and draw out within us. 

I think that we are His works of art, and He is so invested, in seeing us learn, grow, and meet our full potential. He is committed. I feel like each of us embody certain characteristics of Him, and that the entirety of the universe is filled with the anticipation of us becoming all that He's created us to be. And first and foremost (aside from what we DO) that anticipation built up around us knowing who we truly are- sons and daughters of the living God. Sons and daughters of our King! And with Him being King- and us being his BELOVED children- there is an inheritance with that, an authority that we have on this earth now and in the age to come. 

As His children, not only are we taken care of by Him, but empowered to create or reshape life both in the tangible realm and the unseen. Partnering with Him as powerfully creative life forces, since He has come to give us life and life abundantly. I think that we are unsettled with things pertaining only to this realm as the longings we hold within our hearts can only truly be satisfied within our connection with Him. I think that matters of our hearts can hinder that connectedness with Him- not from His standpoint, as I believe His heart is ALWAYS for us, and He is always pursuing us in love. Rather, from our temporal inability to to let go of whatever we are holding and embrace him. (Like in the Garden when God was looking for Adam and he had been hiding.) 

So I think that sin separates us from God, not because God can't get his hands dirty, but because we spend so much effort distancing ourselves due to shame. I think that the purpose of the law was to exemplify how much we couldn't do this life within our own strength and that we are dependent upon God. I think that the commandments were things to help us govern our hearts, and the life that we share with others- a template for how to love well. That this life is about loving God, ourselves, and others with all that we are. And I think that that's where Jesus comes in. 

I believe that we encounter a triune God. Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. And because we can tend to get so wrapped up in performance and the tallies either for or against us, that He came to walk among us- show us how to live dependently upon God, and to shake up everything we ever clung to (whether that be people, places, profession, ideas, etc). He showed us how to truly live in the laying down of His life. He demonstrated that there is life in the laying down of our lives. THAT is love. Emptying out yourself for another person. (but not from that needy I don't value myself but I value you to give up all that I am for you type of way. But from a knowing and experiencing your place of power and surrendering that completely to another). I feel like the reality of life entails learning to live as we are. LOVED. Outrageously and relentlessly loved. And from that place of being loved, loving others. I see community playing a vital role within this. The relationships with our family and friends being both the soil and the tools for this love to develop and grow. These relationships both reveal the truth of what love is, and what it is not. But that ultimately God is above all things, in Him all things hold together. Our relationships, our lives. And our time here we're learning to trust that. To trust Him.

to the comatose

lift up your eyes, o you people
lift them up to the Lord, for it is He that has shone light upon your path
it is He that rescues you
He that saves, heals, sets free
can you not see that it was He who has been beside you? upholding your steps.
open your eyes.
see Light for Light.
dark for dark.
Truth for Truth.
and lie for lie.
you have eyes to see and ears to hear.
they have seen and have heard before.
you have seen and heard.

open up!
open your hearts, your lives
before the Lord, before each other.
there is no need to hide or protect any longer.
for He makes you whole and HE is your defense.
HE is your strength and your song!
do you not remember?
awake! awake!
awake! awake!
you will yet again see, you will yet again hear.
you will taste and see that the Lord is good, that HE alone is God: your sustainer.